Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
