anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
