is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
