I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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