I love black thongs
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
