I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
