All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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