this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize