Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
