Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize