like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize