i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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