You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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