I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
