also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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