..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
