Jerry, you need to find god
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Couch. On fire.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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