I think I just saw someone hide a body.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
did you just send me my own nude
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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