could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She needs sedatives and a leash
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
