Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
