You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
