just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
