Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Have you learned any life lessons?

  (406): View more from Montana

  I like big butts and I cannot lie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Have you learned any life lessons? (406): I like big butts and I cannot lie. http://tfl.nu/s51u
  Replies (11) Good night (3128) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again. http://tfl.nu/vc1t
  Replies (24) Good night (3847) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup. http://tfl.nu/a2al
  Replies (13) Good night (739) Bad night (3458)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore. http://tfl.nu/7ot8
  Replies (24) Good night (6055) Bad night (2099)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang. http://tfl.nu/dwae
  Replies (15) Good night (860) Bad night (5604)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins. http://tfl.nu/vi8m
  Replies (5) Good night (4387) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day http://tfl.nu/8r8f
  Replies (8) Good night (2259) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana? http://tfl.nu/g0t3
  Replies (10) Good night (813) Bad night (1367)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving

  (301): View more from Maryland

  He didn't think we needed a taxi

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving (301): He didn't think we needed a taxi http://tfl.nu/o7fa
  Replies (1) Good night (1575) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits http://tfl.nu/kxc9
  Replies (11) Good night (1736) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that. http://tfl.nu/98gg
  Replies (4) Good night (701) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand http://tfl.nu/akgx
  Replies (1) Good night (528) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours? http://tfl.nu/wt9v
  Replies (6) Good night (345) Bad night (220)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are http://tfl.nu/muz3
  Replies (1) Good night (274) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex http://tfl.nu/5nsy
  Replies (1) Good night (410) Bad night (228)

Randomize