I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
