What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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