lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
