if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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