I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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