I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
