Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
