trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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