just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
