So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
