Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
