is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Found your dick twin last night
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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