Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
