Dual....:-)
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
