just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
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Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
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Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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