What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
It's blow job season.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
