remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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