All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
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he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
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dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
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