You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
