...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
