and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
