none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
