Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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