If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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