My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
