their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
