Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
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These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
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Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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